Friday, 30 September 2016

This is why I can't have nice things...

I masturbated today - nothing fancy, just a plain old honest-to-Glod masturbatory session. My girlfriend was out at work and so I had the place to myself. I had an awkward semi-nap for a while, read some comics, and then put on some porn I like and tried to bring myself to orgasm. One thing I was keen on, however, was not having an orgasm too quickly - I usually take a while (I call this "stamina"; others may disagree), but (having not had one for a few days, at least) I was anxious that it would just be over, and I wouldn't have time to enjoy it.

It all started well enough. I was doing my thing the way I always have, and then just when I felt the main event around the corner, my thought process decided to intervene.

Oh hey, I see you're having a wank. You're about to come, right? That's exciting, isn't it?
But you're not quite ready, are you?
I mean, you wanted to enjoy this, didn't you? Hey, this porn is quite good. Maybe you can enjoy it without having an orgasm, right?
Hey, maybe you should stop.
Stop! NOW!

The next few seconds were confusing. I had both stopped and tried not to stop at the same time, and before I knew what had happened, my shaft was covered in a viscous, sticky substance, but without the stimulation, I hadn't felt anything at all. I had, effectively, made myself come without orgasm, and immediately decided to isolate myself from the world entirely, perhaps moving to Nepal, where I intended to live as a goat.

Then I realised I was still hard.

Trying to ignore the fact that there was a large amount of natural lube to contend with, I managed to start manipulating my foreskin again, getting back into it, the familar size and weight of my throbbing cock in my hand - porn back on, imagination working, penis twitching, hand working up and down. Back in the game.

Before long, I felt orgasm approaching again, and this time, I wrestled my thought process to the ground, followed by giving it a roundhouse kick in the face. This time I was ready, and by gum, I was going to have my orgasm.

And I did. I had my orgasm. The deep, shuddering pleasure accompanied by a pulsating cock, shooting... well... nothing.

Hmmm, something's missing here, I thought. For a couple of wild moments, I thought that I'd somehow broken myself; then I realised that I came earlier, and maybe this was just the second half of that event. Before I realised that this was a stupid idea, my cock gave one last Herculean twitch, and I suddenly - and unexpectedly - shot several strings of very thick, very sticky cum... all over my nice grey jumper.

I grabbed the tissues, set to work cleaning everything up, and then started thinking about exactly how much it would cost to get this jumper properly cleaned, and if it wouldn't just be less trouble to think of some alternative.

See you in Nepal!

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