Sunday, 1 March 2015

Clutching at Straws

Three years ago today, I was trying to explain the concept of Eroticon to my dad without mentioning sex. I think I did it rather well. At the end of the week, I got up at 4am, walked to a train station that's further away from my other two local stations, and was in Bristol by 8.

Two years ago today, my gran died. I was heading home from work when I got the call - I knew it was happening. I was going to go and see her, but was still on my commute when she died. I spoke at her funeral and touched her coffin, but I never saw her again. I requested a day off work. I didn't get one, although I got to go home early for the funeral. My boss took up the shortfall for me. At the end of the week, I went to Eroticon.

One year ago today, I was settled. I knew where I'd be in a week's time; I knew where I'd be in the summer. I had a forward plan (although it didn't work out like that); I had a wedding to go to. I was more confident, more self-assured and felt much more valuable. At the end of the week, I went to Eroticon.

Today, I woke up wracked with guilt that I didn't write enough songs during February, and shame that I can't get past the third boss in Luigi's Mansion 2.

I think it's a safe assumption that I'm feeling a little lost right now.

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