Thursday, 31 July 2014

Mister Smooth strikes again!

I switched my netbook on yesterday evening with more of a view to checking my e-mails than anything else (spoiler: there wasn't anything exciting when I did eventually get around to doing so). Getting online was, as it turns out, an incredibly difficult task. I'd been out in the wilds for a couple of hours after failing to get online in the first place, blindly assuming that if I left my computer off and turned it back on, it would work the second time...

...oh, and I really wanted a milkshake...

...but the problem re-presented itself. The BT hotspot I was connecting through just doesn't want to make itself known. It's gone somewhere, and when it does rear its digital wireless head, it's an incredibly brief experience. A bit like sex with Boris Becker, really, except this time you don't have to make any ball jokes. After about an hour of sitting there cursing at the screen to no avail, I decided to try and broach the company's network instead.

Which also took me about an hour. With people expecting Windows XP to be used about as frequently as they're expecting the Spanish Inquisition, there was absolutely no guide to how to use XP to attack said network, so eventually I had to fake my way through the instructions via bits of Control Panel that don't seem to exist on XP. It took me far too long and cost me far too much effort, and basically undid the expensive spa treatment I'd had earlier on. So yeah, thanks for that, company.

Eventually I managed to get onto a relatively stable connection and immediately opened a lot of tabs to check out my favourite sites for updates - this includes basically all the blogs you can see on my sidebar. The more eagle-eyed of you may have noticed a recent post by GOTN which starts with a snapshot of her boobs - one of the tabs I tried to open contained that post. Or at least it would if the company hadn't put a block on what they termed "sex sites" - they'd also blocked, plus vTunnel, so I was a little stuck.

I snapped open Skype and bombarded 47 with questions until he set up a little tunnel for me to use via PuTTY, which I did, and after messing with the proxy settings in Firefox I managed to gain free and unrestricted Internet access, about two and a half hours after I logged in to merely check my e-mails. I hit F5 several times until all my tabs had refreshed. As I'd had GOTN's blog open before I started tunnelling, this was the one that refreshed first.

"BOOBS!" I shouted at the top of my voice.

Because I'm just that cool.

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