Monday, 30 June 2014

#AdultSexEdMonth - why do we need to educate adults?


I wanted to contribute to Adult Sex Ed Month - today is the last day - and I was planning to do so even before June started. But time ran away with me and I got lazy and busy and all sorts of things ending in Y that delayed be from writing a post. By this point, there are so many fantastic articles on the site that you're almost spoilt for choice with the amount of tips, tricks and advice adult sex ed can provide. Following the hashtag #AdultSexEdMonth is also worth doing.

So in an attempt to round up the month: why do we need adult sex ed at all?

Click for the site, y'know
Those of us over the age of 18 are meant to be The Font Of All Sexual Knowledge. We're the sex educators, the parents, the teachers, the older, wiser and more experienced bunch. Most of us have had sex, the average Brit having lost their virginity by the age of 17. Crucially, we've been through sex education ourselves - we have, of course, all had different experiences with sex ed (some good, some not so good, some almost too good) and we're the ones who are supposed to be passing it on. If we know it all, then why should we be educating ourselves as well?

I see the answer to that as simple: we don't know everything. Sex is a sweeping, diverse landscape and there's so much to do and explore - one of the main reasons why I love writing about it so much. 

And I've been doing that for a long time - sex blogging since 2007 and writing about sex in my everyday blog since way before that, in 2001. Like a lot of people, I started having sex in my teens and have been doing so intermittently ever since, although there have also been long periods of sexual inactivity. I've masturbated myself silly throughout the years and, although it took me a while, I dived in headfirst when it came to meeting up with people who could teach me more about sex - what with the CCK socials, Spiritual Space, Erotic Meet, Eroticon and even casual meetups since and around then. I've also been on sex ed courses, both being taught and being trained how to teach, and wrote/delivered a session at one of them.

I'm still learning more. I'm still discovering things that I never thought I would. I'm still finding things out there that I never knew existed. I'm close to people that I wouldn't have dreamed of being close to ten years ago. Every time I read a blog, talk to someone, discuss sex in an open way, attend an event... every time I do that, I'm learning. I'm expanding my knowledge. Every time, the world of sex gets a little larger and the light in my heart gets a little brighter.

And that is why we need sex ed - because it's not all about putting condoms on cucumbers and how not to get AIDS. It's more than just dispelling the myths about having sex standing up and that boys can't get raped. It's above and beyond a clear definition of what the age of consent may or may not be in Britain and around the world. All those things are important, yes, but it's so much more than that.

Sex ed is about understanding and opening up to each other. It's about sharing, the love of information, the appreciation of diversity, and how it unites and unifies us. It should be there for us to give to each other.

And that is why adults need sex ed. Because, in turn, it needs us too.

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