Thursday, 7 November 2013


I looked up from my chair, having just remembered I was meant to be working. My client sat there in front of me, with an inquisitive look on his face. But he wasn't looking at me; he was frowning at the paper he balanced on his knee, looking decidedly indecisive about what to put. He was even chewing on a pencil - my pencil.

"How are you doing?" I ventured.
"How am I doing?" he said.
Kira Reed gave a great shuddering gasp in response and pushed his head back between her thighs, which was probably an appropriate thing to do.

Blink. Focus, ILB. It's just something he said. It's not a cue to start linking everything anyone says to a scene in soft porn.

Thankfully, the dialogue in the rest of the scene which had just leapt into my brain from four very innocent words couldn't really come out in a normal working situation. Added to the fact that my client didn't look a bit like actor Micah Bradshaw, that settled me down a bit.

I ran through the dialogue that would put me back into the scene:
- "Gently! Gently!" [Not likely to be said.]
- "Try to think of it as an experience, not a conquest." [Would be nice if I could slip that into conversation, but no.]
- "Well, I was hoping to have... sex with you." [Say that, and I'd get fired. But they don't have any problem with "fuck off".]
- "Fine. You have no problems at all there." [Need to avoid that one.]

Readjusting my brain as best I could, I turned back to the task at hand. My client, hopefully oblivious to what I was thinking about - I'm probably right in assuming not everyone watches Passion Cove - was looking up at me now.

"How's this?" he said, handing me the paper. I took a cursory glance over what he'd written. Looked good to me.
"Wonderful!" I replied.
Kira Reed relaxed onto the bed, breathing heavily, while Micah Bradshaw got his breath back.


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