Sunday, 11 August 2013

Soft Porn Sunday: Krista Allen & Paul Michael Robinson

This one's soft, sensual and sexy, and has perhaps the strangest ending to a sex scene I've ever seen (barring that one in Snapdragon with Pamela Anderson, but let's not go into that...). Involving feathers. Although not in, uhm, "that" way.

Just making that clear.

Appearance: Emmanuelle 4: Concealed Fantasy, aka There's More to Love than Sex (1994)
Characters: Emmanuelle & Haffron


OMGZ ACTUAL PUBIC HAIR!!!1
I've talked about this series before: even featured a scene from this specific episode of the continuing saga that is the Emmanuelle in Space storyline. In fact, no less than four Soft Porn Sundays have featured Paul Michael Robinson in role as Haffron - impressive, perhaps, when you consider how many scenes I have to choose from. (Clue: It's a lot.) So why return to choose another scene? Why not diversify it up, choose another erotic sci-fi film like Pleasurecraft or Andromina: The Pleasure Planet? Or even The Exotic Time Machine II: Forbidden Encounters?

Well, those all have their moments. But this one particular scene has been on my mind a lot recently, and since it's been dogging my memories, I may as well throw it onto my blog for all and sundry.

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin.

Out of the seven films to choose from in the sequence, Concealed Fantasy has by far the most sex; eight scenes in total, all of which featuring Haffron - seven with Emmanuelle in. As much as I like variety in my sex scenes, there is something about Emmanuelle/Haffron that I quite like, as they are the main characters, and have good chemistry on screen. There's also the fact that they're having sex purely because they can (they don't fall in love until the end) - originally it was all to do with some lame excuse like the aliens doing research, but here it's clearly all to do with the fact that they can have sex, so do.

A lot.


They even added kiss sound effects. Really.
This is the first sex scene after a long break which involves some sort of plot device based around a party scene, although there's very little to do with the plot in said scene: it's just an excuse to fill out a few minutes. Sitting through that rewards you with this, which makes no pretence as to being anything that it won't be. We start with Emmanuelle (Allen) on top of Haffron (Robinson), and it's incredibly clear from the offset that that isn't going to change at all. We also, pleasingly, start with a kiss - something that I still think is missing from a lot of softcore - before actual-penetration-that-isn't-actually-actual happens. Five seconds of kiss, in fact, before we mix quickly to Emmanuelle gently rocking up and down.

Continue for a while.

This is sex in the astride ("cowgirl") position, but it's not bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy sex. As I said, this one is slow and sensuous (and possibly other adjectives beginning with S), and there's less energetic bouncing than there is gentle little bumps up and down, both bodies moving in sync.

This being one of the alleged 3D scenes - although, upon viewing with actual 3D glasses, that adds nothing but a splitting headache [Let me try... Ow! Jesus! - JB] and something that may or may not be a 3D candle. It also adds a merry-go-round effect, which I generally don't like, but since there's not a lot of movement going on here, at least the camera having fun adds something. The classic Emmanuelle in Space sound effects go here too, what with the occasional moan indicating pleasure and the weird synthy music which wouldn't sound out of place in a hippy bar - it's very much iconic of the series.

I don't really need to mention the actors. Both Allen and Robinson have nice bodies. Allen has great
Giant arm! Been masturbating much, Haffron?
breasts, which she shows off in this scene, as well as nice hair, which hangs down in various positions throughout. Robinson also has nice hair, even if his arms do look a little disproportionately large (Haffron is supposed to be muscular) at times. We do get to see a fair proportion of their bodies, though (see the screenshot) - in fact, with a few obvious exceptions, everything's on show here, and the circling camera tells us so too. I like a shot with full bodies, as it seems more realistic to me (even if it isn't). And the décor of the room is... well... it's décor. The plants are a bit annoying, but at least they tried.


Partway through the scene, after a couple of mixes to Emmanuelle's face and back again and Haffron stops PUTTING HIS FUCKING HANDS EVERYWHERE, Emmanuelle decides to initiate a conversation mid-coitus.

"So... foreign policy, eh?"
Okay, this is a good idea, in theory... I'm just not entirely sure it works in practice. I don't really like talking during sex anyway, not even dirty talk, although I will say things like "almost... almost... almost... oh, there we are" if you really want. But this, a debate on the pros and cons of "getting caught" (in what act? Not during sex, they've just been at a party!), as well as some other tripe about Haffron not understanding humans (because he's just so adorably sheltered!) just seems like an excuse to make sex more "meaningful" - which, of course, it is - it's not really distracting, but it does seem like the end of a scene. It isn't... they go on for a while longer, which makes me wonder why they didn't just insert this dialogue at some point either before or after the sex. In fact, it might even have made a good preamble.

Anyway, then Emmanuelle starts hitting Haffron with a pillow. 

No, I've no idea either. I also don't know why they use the same laughter sound effect over and over
EMMANUELLE SMASH!
again and why neither of them sneeze or show any signs of being tickled on account of the fact that there are feathers all over the place. Or how they're going to explain that to the hotel staff. Whatever. They then continue having sex for a while, and once the music has stopped (with one final bass note on some sort of brass instrument), we fade to the next scene.


Must have been fun to film, at least.

Why do I like this scene? Or, more accurately, why has it been in my head all week? Well, I'm not keen on the dialogue-y bits or the feathery bits (seriously, I'd find that distracting, I squirm and squeak when tickled or even at the thought of being tickled!), but I really like the first half. It's not very energetic, but it's touchy, feely, rocky, sense-y sex, and I like that. It also fits in well with the plot and general angle of the series,
It's Christmas!
which is after all about relationships in all shapes (well, human shape) and sizes (well, some sizes). Yes, it is essentially middle-of-the-road sex; there's nothing particularly special about it. But, for what it is, I like it, anyway. The music, movement and setting all make for a good scene.


Even if it does end up with stupid feathers everywhere.

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