Tuesday, 15 January 2013


It's never exactly a certainty that I'll get a lot of sleep. Last night is a bit of a curio in that regard as, although I'm pretty certain I did get an amount of sleep, I must not have refuelled enough, due to the fact that when I got on the train after work (bearing in mind that I finished at 12:30 today, so I wasn't exactly going all the way through until six) I felt ready to drop... or let myself fall. Shaking off the cobwebs of my mind for long enough, I fumbled my way through a job centre session, trod my weary way home and, at 3:30ish, blasted through the first solid food I'd had since 7AM. I felt very high-powered, but working on low power nonetheless.

As you can probably imagine, it didn't take much to persuade me that a rest would be a good idea.

I bundled into bed next to my equally sleepy girlfriend (who has, for the past few days, been valiantly battling the mother-of-all-colds, so has her own reasons to be hella tired), preparing for a little rest. After a few minutes, during which I could have sworn I closed my eyes, I got up and logged onto my computer.

I opened up my massive repository of porn and found a multitude of files ready to titillate and delight me. Filtering out all that I didn't want to watch, I settled upon a Japanese porn star whose name I knew well. I was about to open one of the videos featuring her, before I paused and reflected for a while. Immediately deciding that I needed a new video with this certain lady, I snapped open Firefox and proceeded to run multiple Google searches for Japanese porn, hoping this certain porn star would crop up. Lo and behold, there she was - and I started to download more and more, while wondering which video I should watch first...

...all while my girlfriend pottered around behind me doing things and asking me gentle questions.

Of course, this was a dream. I don't have a massive repository of porn that isn't soft, and I'm pretty sure all the Japanese AV idols I know of don't have a name like the one I chose (I can't actually remember the name, but it was quite a long one - something like Utsumi Yukie, although not her, because she's a girl from Battle Royale). I'm also pretty sure that I wouldn't be likely to scutter around the internet as opposed to watching a file that I already possess.

But what gets me was how gleeful I appeared to be in this dream. I was clearly excited by the prospect of, not watching porn, but searching for it. I guess it's the same with sex; when some is on the cards, it's the excitement, the anticipation, that really gets me going, so that when it actually happens, it's so magnificent... a climax before the climax, shall we say? Naturally, in the dream I never actually managed to watch any of the porn - I rarely do in dreams, and when I do it's always disappointing. (And usually with someone. No prizes for guessing who would have been my viewing buddy in this situation.)

All the same, I'm glad I had the dream. Shows me that all my important bits are still working, that I still have that spark of anticipation.

And, due to the fact that I know exactly which build of Firefox I was using in it, it also shows that I'm still a massive geek.


Vlada said...

Strange thing about sleep.. i have almost the same problem, i can never rest enough, no matter how much i sleep :|

Innocent Loverboy said...

I have a similar problem - I rarely sleep at night, but have the unfortunate habit of dropping off in the afternoon, not being rested when I awake from that either!