Monday, 22 October 2012

Glimpse into the unknown

When I was in year 7, I started going home from school via my Nan's house. It was on the way home and, even though my house was only five minutes from school, a halfway stop was always appreciated, especially as I usually got a snack from Nanna and, occasionally, a very lazy lift home. I continued this tradition through until the end of year 9 (or thereabouts) - a routine that I slipped into, mostly because it involved food.

At some point - I must have been in year 8 at this point, so aged 12 or possibly 13 - I was sitting in a bedroom upstairs (although I've no idea why; it's the darkest room in the house and there's no real reason to be in there), and I saw something through the window (and the window of another house - not the one that backs directly on, my cousins lived there, but close by).

It was a girl changing her clothes.

I didn't know where to look. I was very young then, but I still knew what a voyeur was. I knew that looking through two windows wasn't wrong, but here was a girl - who hadn't closed her curtains - taking her top off. In plain view, although I'm sure she didn't think anything of it. And for all I knew, it would be over quickly. So, what with being curious and still coming to terms with my budding sexuality - I peeked.

I don't know who it was. From what I saw, she would have been about my age. She stripped off her top - lifting it above her head in what I thought was a very sexy way - and then put another one on. For the few seconds in between the two, I saw a shapely torso, breasts well-developed enough to warrant wearing a bra (although forgive me for not remembering the colour), and hair which (when loosened from being tied back, as school uniform liked to dictate) fell gracefully down her back.

Feeling both shocked at myself for watching (although it's not like I was up a tree or in a bush) and gleeful, I headed downstairs. I'd just seen a real girl taking her top off! Perhaps somebody my age, perhaps even in my class - definitely at the same school, as the school was right next to where that house would have been. Yes, it was in the distance; yes, there were two windows in the way, and from how far away I was, she appeared about as large as my little finger - 6cm, according to my ruler - but I'd still seen her. Here it was - proof that girls took their tops off. And wore bras.

At that age, although I'd probably started watching soft porn by then, this was a wonderful experience, which (looking back on it now) I feel a bit sullied by. Invasion of privacy and all that. At least I wasn't watching anyone have sex or anything. It was just a few seconds' glimpse into another world.

I returned to that room every day for the rest of the week. I never saw her again. Or maybe I did - but at school. And who knows which one of the girls in my year that may have been?

1 comment:

Jillian said...

I totally remember being a voyeur at that age. Although I never saw anything of note, mind you. I sorta missed out on the good stuff, which is quite sad, because it would have been a nicer formative experience than when I saw my dad naked in the tub as a young'un.

I still am a bit of a voyeur though...