Sunday, 23 September 2012

Soft Porn Sunday: Susan Featherly & Mike Roman

It is nice, sometimes, to discover something you like that you didn't know existed before. Better still, perhaps, to discover it in your possession, free to access and enjoy at your leisure. Even better when it's... okay, I think you know perfectly well where this is going.

In any case, I found this one on a disc I have and had never really given it much of a second glance on account of the fact that there are other scenes in this film that have more of an effect upon me. I don't even recall downloading it - although I've downloaded a lot of stuff over the years - 

Appearance: Andromina - The Pleasure Planet (1999)
Characters: Xula & Omar

 I don't need to go through the premise of this one, do I? It's the same male character as presented in the scene I've previously reviewed, although further along in his storyline. Seeing as how his storyline mostly involves having sex while maintaining a rather irritating hairstyle, it's not surprising he gets to do so twice in rather rapid succession. The fact that it's with two different girls doesn't surprise me, either, except that in this one there's a switch in the balance of control. Or something else that makes me sound clever. Like, you know, whatever.

Okay. Omar/Becca kind of worked because Becca, played by Shannan Leigh, was a strong female character. When they had sex, it was because she threw herself at him, knowing what she wanted and how to get it. During the actions of actual coitus, Omar was in control of the sex, but only because he knew what he was doing and she was a virgin. Just not a doe-eyed, frail Bella Swan to be deflowered - a powerful, self-assured woman who wanted pleasure and took it.

Omar/Xula is different somehow. The story is hardly massive, but basically, Omar escapes from Becca after they go on the run ("before they execute us both" - wow, this planet is violent!) and just happens to chance across Xula - which, I'll admit, is a great alien name; much closer to what traditional sci-fi may expect aliens to be called than "Becca", or worse, "Roxie" - who, as another resident of a planet entirely populated by women - has also never had sex with a man, so inevitably they end up having sex. The difference is that, although not a weedy or weak character, during sex Xula is much less certain of herself, and the whole scene is much less aggressive in the way it's presented or played out.

One thing I'll say for Susan Featherly - who I hadn't actually clocked before but now I seem to recognise in more things - is that she does make it seem like Xula is genuinely enjoying this special moment. She has a lovely smile, which she manages to wear all over her body throughout the scene, and for the orgasmic bits she opens her mouth with aplomb. The movement of her body is even somewhat experimental, and somehow - although I'm not quite sure how - she does make it seem as if she's both experiencing and enjoying sex (with a man) for the first time, which isn't something I'd initially think one could do with a body in a cheesy film, but here we have it! As for Mike Roman, well, his job isn't really to do much here apart from be a man who knows how to make love outside - but he plays his part. He says a line afterwards which is poorly delivered, but I can ignore that (although not really).

Although I do like the scene in parts, I do have a problem with the length of the thing. It's 05:36 long - which is quite long for a sex scene - but the first two minutes consist entirely of frottage and gradual disrobing. I am aware, of course, of both facts that foreplay often takes a lot longer than two minutes and that it also involves more than taking your clothes off and rubbing each other a bit (unless it's a quickie, in which case I assume you're more up for it before you start unbuttoning), but this is softcore, and what the viewers want to see is simulated sexual intercourse. That's how it works. At the 02:04 mark, where the sex starts to happen, it gets more exciting, however.

So they start off with reverse cowgirl. It's an odd position to start with, but in real actual life and stuff, I've often heard that reversing the astride position is a good way to lose one's virginity on account of the fact that the angle of the body and the erect penis go together quite well, although I'd always considered the missionary position to be a better one for that. I lost my own virginity having sex in the traditional astride position, which also worked pretty well. But I digress. It's less bouncy than it can sometimes be in softcore, Xula actually rocking back and forth on top of Omar rather than riding him, which I think works well.

Think about it. She's just been penetrated for the first time and she's probably currently adjusting her body to the feeling of his penis inside her. I'd expect her to slow down her movements a bit and maybe rock back and forth rather than just go for it like a jackhammer. It makes sense to me!

Anyway, this goes on for a bit (with rather shaky camera work, which is slightly off-putting, I'll admit) before it mixes to some variant of doggie style - which is believable, because they wouldn't really need to disengage too much. And in fact, during the mix, you get about half a second of Xula leaning forwards and Omar rearing up onto his knees. This is more familiar to us, as we've already seen Omar doing the same position with Becca! Doesn't the guy know how to do it from the front? Switch it up, dude! So it gets faster and harder quite quickly - but too speedily for it to be believable - until 03:35, where it finally (and surprisingly) mixes to the dénouement, which is... oral sex.

I know. It usually happens first, right? But I guess there's no rule that actually say you can't have oral sex after sexual intercourse, and it does fill up the last couple of minutes with some nice shots of Xula lying on her back and smiling while Omar's head is somewhere which may or may not actually be near her genitals, and then - this is unusual - some simulated oral sex from Xula to Omar, which (although she's bobbing her head up and down, something they usually forget to do in these films) is a bit lame, due to the fact that Mike Roman is making some truly stupid faces while Featherly is clearly kissing his stomach. Still, it's a brave attempt.

It ends with a cuddle, which is lovely!

Okay, so I like... some of this scene. I'd be lying if I said I didn't often skip to the sex bits, as they're usually my favourite bits of any scene and the rest of it seems slightly limp, as if they're just filling time with foreplay which I like to assume has already happened and oral sex which seems a slightly weak ending to a more dramatic sequence of events, but it's done well enough, it suits the characters and the setting's quite nice. It's outside - most of the scenes in this film are - and in a more idyllic setting than Becca's tribal village. The costumes, for what we see of them, are vaguely well-thought-out, and it all looks pretty - down to Susan Featherly's long blonde hair, which I like.

But it does have to be said: one thing I can't forgive is the music. It's bland and uninspired. I know that that can be a problem with softcore, but a lot of the other scenes in this film have some really good music, which fits the scene and the characters - and even the actions; one thing that makes a good scene for me. Here, however, it's just chugging and undynamic - it doesn't really go anywhere, it doesn't do anything and, crucially, it doesn't add anything to the scene.

So. A good scene, in my own experienced opinion - but one that could be made better by being shortened and having more appropriate music. I'm still pleased to have discovered it, though.

No comments: