I've been in this job for barely a week and already I'm feeling the twitch. Not to leave, or to change anything (although I might need to start bringing a camp bed to satiate both the want of something to do during the three-hour-or-so break I have in the middle of the day and the general haze of tiredness that I found plaguing me this morning), but to give in to my primal urges and sink back into the world of blogs and e-mails and Twitter and... well, general ILBness... that keeps me going.
I am well aware that when I feel down and out (and in this job that happens every now and again, of course), I simply remind myself that I am ILB, and that makes me feel like I have more of a sense of self-worth and stuff. And, of course, it's not like the idea of the ILB blog was to write about sex while I'm not busy with work (which is the reason you find me writing this post on a work computer in my break). But, with a few small exceptions, for the past year-and-a-half I've been out of work, and apart from actually putting any amount of effort into things every once in a while, it's almost a solid time period of just being ILB. It's difficult to throw myself in at the deep end and not feel the call to tap away at a keyboard and craft my post every once in a while.
Of course my evenings are different. I went to the Distraction Club last night and, although that's not a purely ILBased activity, it was ILB who promised @MsClara three hugs. And this weekend I have not only the Erotic Meet, and the proposed meetup of the same group on Saturday, but also Mane's little brother's birthday party (for which I really do need to sort out a costume tonight, as it's tomorrow and I need to get one ready if I can) - although, again, that's not an ILB thing.
I was standing in front of a group of clients today. They were all busy doing whatever it is they do when they're not addressing me directly and I found myself staring, not at them, but at the computer terminal. I opened GMail, and automatically typed in my ILB GMail address, as opposed to either of my others. Why? I don't know. It just happened. And so I checked and replied to some e-mails. I'm sure that nobody can begrudge me that, especially as I used private browsing. Nevertheless, it did feel a bit naughty, especially as I was checking the e-mail address that's got a large stockpile of naked pictures of my girlfriend a few clicks away. Not that I looked at any, of course... just in case.
And so I feel the twitch. What does a sex blogger do at work? Secretly update blogs? Have sex with someone via text while in a board meeting? Not wear any underwear? Shamelessly browse Tumblr? Masturbate in the toilets or, if you're feeling daring, at your seat? I really am very poorly-versed in this sort of thing, although I see it mentioned all the time on Twitter... what people are doing to stay sexy at work.
But I'm feeling the twitch. So, with limitations considering what I do... suggestions, people. Suggestions.