Thursday, 26 April 2012

So say we all...

There's this girl who hangs around at work. I think that's the technical term, but it's definitely the literal one. I've never actually seen her do any real work. According to lore, she's the big boss' PA. But I've never seen the big boss either. Here in the underclass that is our department, we have few visitors. The occasional client, a past employee or two, and the cleaning staff, which consists entirely of one man who I've never heard say a word, although he's hit me with his vacuum a couple of times. But this girl isn't bad company. She turns up to see one specific member of staff, but he's barely ever around. I'm usually sitting here doing nothing, though, so she knows my name by now at least.

I walked into the break room today to find her sitting there, having a conversation with my geeky colleague about antidepressants. Well, I say geeky. He's not a real geek, but he used to play AD&D a bit and he knows what Alien Breed is. He's not me, but as a geek-in-training he's not half bad. He's who this girl comes to see. And there they were, having a conversation about antidepressants. I joined in, mostly to interject the fact that what they were technically talking about was "selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors". I stopped short of explaining how they actually worked, as I think that may have caused some sort of seizure.

As isn't difficult to imagine, it transpired that all of us have been prescribed SSRIs at some point in the past. And they've all had the same effect. While the rest of us were hedging the subject, my geeky colleague put it succinctly: "my dick stopped working." The girl said that the same had happened to her - not insofar as she has a dick which stopped working, of course... but something to the same effect. She had trouble, she admitted, reaching the grand finale. But then again, I think we all did. That's what SSRIs do. It's an unpleasant side-effect.

But we all stopped taking them pretty soon afterwards. And as she put it, she'd rather be prone to bouts of intense depressive mania than go for years without a spark of sexual pleasure at all.

As would I, dear lady. As would I.

No comments: