Thursday, 12 May 2011

The Subconscious Scribe

If I seem fidgety today, it's because I am. I woke up this morning from a dream in which one of my friends (I won't say which) wrote me a letter.

Please fuck me, the letter said. I want you to fuck me. I want you to fuck me very, very badly. I need it, I need you inside me. I can't bear it any more, when you touch me, even the lightest touch, because I want more. Fuck me... now.

As with most of my sex dreams, I didn't end up having sex with the person in question, and with the one that involved RS, I did manage to have sex, but felt incredibly guilty about it afterwards. Maybe we did. I can't remember - it was a dream, after all. I kind of remember lying on top of her, but I don't recall penetration.

However, nobody's ever said that to me, even in letter form. Some people have said similar things to me, or said things that infer those things, but nobody's ever said that to me, pretty much verbatim. I guess it's the forceful nature of the letter that turned me on. Or maybe it's just my body reacting to me not having had sex for four and a half months, coupled with the fact that it would have been our three-year anniversary yesterday. Or maybe it's just dumb circumstance.

I know sex dreams are the body's way of dealing with the sex drive in a healthy way - but why this friend, and why these words? And why was I so turned on by it? Answers on a postcard...!

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