Wednesday, 14 July 2010

Not tonight, dear

I went to work yesterday feeling like I really needed to have sex. Granted, that was entirely my fault; I had a sneaky watch of soft porn before I'd left for work, but the feeling hadn't dissipated when I left the house. It hadn't even gone by the time I got on the train. I wasn't turned on so much when I eventually got to work (and a good thing that is, too; turning up with a huge erect cock may have got me slightly into trouble...), but the background noise was still there, like an echo that had yet to recede.

It didn't bother me so much until I reached my first break. This was half an hour, give or take, and although my bad angel was clearly goading me ("Go on, ILB, have a wank in the staff toilers, you've done it before, as long as you're not hurting anyone..."), my good angel - the one that usually speaks with my voice - took precedence ("That's stupid. You'll feel like a prat, you'll be ashamed of yourself, and you'll be flushed, so your colleagues will ask if you're running a temperature or something.") and I quickly dismissed the idea of relieving myself of my horniness.

Alas, the through of masturbation - especially in an accessible place - had somewhat brought back indecent thoughts, coupled with flashes of soft porn scenes I know well. I shrugged it off with great effort and returned to my work.

And eventually came my lunch break.

At this point, fate was really conspiring against me. Not only was I once more free of things to do, I had a while hour in which to do them, nobody would care if I were back late, and while eating my lunch (which included chocolate), I was reading an uncorrected proof copy of Losing It, which is a collection of stories about first-time sex. Damn you, world!

"Well, look who's come crawling back,|" cackled my bad angel as I entered the staff toilet. In my defence, I genuinely needed to use the toilet, but we all knew what was going to happen. Up came the flashes, again, this time recollections of sex that I'd actually had myself (ref: the last two years; sub ref: last week; location: my bed; position: astride). And that's not the only thing that came up. I was sitting there with an erection and the way ahead was clear. So I ignored it until it went away and then continued having my break.

Yes, really.

It was the most difficult thing I've done since GCSE Maths. But I went back to work and finished off the day nicely, without and sort of painful internal struggle. I am awesome.

Then I had a really nice orgasm when I got home.


ladypandorah said...

I'm curious to know what kind of voice your bad angel speaks with.

LP x

Innocent Loverboy said...

He sounds like the Hitcher from The Mighty Boosh, funnily enough.

ladypandorah said...

Hah! Brilliant.

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