Saturday, 18 July 2009

Excitement

...and I'm not talking about sexual arousal. Odd, I know.

The commencement of a romantic relationship is a very exciting thing. It was in my case, anyway, once I'd got over the initial shock of the fact that I actually had a girlfriend (it took me about a week). The fact that one is due to, for whatever reason, meet up with one's (new) significant other incited a feeling somewhat unique. It's a kind of 'continuous' excitement, the kind that makes you feel like there's a balloon inflating in your chest, or even that you can float a few inches above the ground yourself. The initial few meetups, in my case anyway, were characterised by an almost-euphoric state of anticipation preceding the actual event.

Not the kind of anticipation you get when thinking, "in under 24 hours I'll have had sex." I've had those moments too, and they're not half as good.

Over time, one may expect this sort of feeling to subside - and should it happen to me, I'd work hard to make that not so. On account of the fact that I never even thought I'd get a(nother) girlfriend, I have never slipped into a state of blind acceptance that it's actually happening. I'm appreciating every minute of my relationship, with a moderate fear somewhere in the back of my mind that it may at any minute be snuffed out, should I make an unforgivable faux pas, or not compare to some stylish and cool other gentleman who enters the scene with the sole intent of stealing her away.

So I appreciate it. Every damn second.

I still feel the excitement. The buzz is still there, no matter who's making the journey, or where; should a meetup occur between us (and with my work, it's getting really difficult; we haven't had a full weekend, or more, in ages), I still feel the shiver. The tingle of anticipation. I know what is to come, and it usually involves kisses. And hugs. And, most importantly, love.

We don't live together, but should we ever do, I'd hope to feel that tingle still, every day, approaching the time when we can be together again. After all, everyone's got to have something to look forward to.

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