Saturday, 5 July 2008

It's a fucking beautiful game

I don't like football one bit. I don't actually like sports, much. I've been enjoying the tennis on TV in bits, used to enjoy a round of golf, have a killer serve in ping-pong, and play Wii Sports, but that's about it. Football I hate with every fibre of my being. Not only am I rubbish at it, it's an incredibly violent game that makes people do stupid things.

Spain won the Euro Cup Thingy last week, and in this case it's the porn industry that lost out, and that makes me angry (because I seem to work better when I'm upset about something). "The three-day International Erotic Film Festival of Barcelona," says the Metro, "normally attracts around 50,000 sex fans* but organisers claim only 15,000 turned up this year."
What were the usual crowd doing? They were at home, watching football on the TV. Without pointing out the rather glaringly obvious solution of taking a portable radio with you to find out the final score - it cuts out the 90 minutes of men running about on some grass, which is all the sport entails - this confuses me. A festival of interesting erotic films or some football.

It doesn't seem like a choice, but evidently it was made.

"Football is one of the few things that can compete with sex," said FICEB director Juli Simon. Er... dare I say, "lol wut"?

I know which one I'd prefer.

But now, of course, I want to have sex in a changing room or something. That's the way my brain works, it seems.

* "Sex fans"? Are there people who don't like sex?

2 comments:

ladypandorah said...

I feel very proud of myself whenever some 'crucial' match is on the telly and I manage to seduce Mister into rolling around with me. Especially if a goal is scored in the meantime.

I'm evil sometimes.

But, I need attention more than pixels on a TV screen, damnit!

The Drinker said...

Sadly, the Spanish are not alone. Apparently British women are guilty of something even worse:

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/tv/a104645/women-rush-through-sex-for-tv-shows.html

xx